Bye Bye 2008

Oh it’s time to say good bye to the Year 2008 and welcome 2009. It seems as one more ‘Blink and Miss Year’ is fading away. Or may be time just flies like that. But wait a sec, let me think over it and see how the Year 2008 had been for me. May be from Feb 08, I started listening to Western Music, it was something that I was not used to listen to before. And what a great surprise it turned out to be for me. After all Music is Music and Good Music always Rocks ! And I enrolled myself into a Management Course. Made a few nice friends, tried my luck in French and Western Music, was able to get out of a sad and sorry mental state, learnt to stay Happy and Move on and Rock on !!! And yes last but not the least, I had some great quality moments spent with my Family. I’v got to write so many things about this year but I am running short of time today. So this is a small Good Bye note for the Year 2008. It added one more glorious page in the book called ‘life’. And I’ll cherish every moment of it till death. Bye Bye 2008 !

Hello Sky

Hello, Hello Sky!
Bend a bit to listen to me
I want to touch your snowy wings
But it’s not within my reach
Why do you have to be so far away
It baffles me sometimes
But if you can just bend a bit
Just for once
For me to touch your snowy wings
Just by raising my tiny hands
Bend a bit to listen to me
I dream of you every night
and then,
Why do you have to be fazed away
When I open my eyes?
I try to search for you everyday
But you seem to have flown away
Far away…
It seems
You again ditched me.
But I can’t give it up.
I will try to reach you again.
One day,
You will be in my reach
and I’ll be touching your snowy wings
just by raising my tiny hands….

//These lines were written a few days ago, though not very polished ones, but then I am not a professional writer. This blog is meant for writing my all vague thoughts. So today when I read them, I decided to put them on the blog.

A New Sun Has Arisen

Today a new sun has arisen from the fine lines of horizon. The sun rays are unusual today. The sun light is quite different. A unique calmness and a desired peace it is carrying in its radiant rays. I am feeling a bit surprised and a bit bewildered too. Where this new sun has arisen from? What hidden message this new sun wants to convey to me? Does it want to give me an unknown message to rejuvenate my dead dreams and hopes? Or does it want to show me a new way and a new outlook towards life? I want to know and my curiosity is springing up as its gleeful rays are falling on me. Hmm…there is something unusual and unique with the sun today. It was never like this before. It was never so enchanting. I have never felt its rays so soothing and composed before.

Yes it seems to me, “Today a new sun has arisen from the fine lines of horizon.”

la la la la la ..I wanna fly high high high .. lol

Humm I have written so much serious stuff there in the blog. Lemme now write something that just hits my head. Well I wanted to write some very serious stuff lol but suddenly changed my mind. Whenever I feel like talking to somebody, and I don’t get anybody by my side, then I talk to my own self. As a matter of fact, most of the time I keep talking to my own self. I do want to make friends, but may be not very good at that Art. Did you know making friends is also an Art.. hum?

Oh about the title, yeah I was singing something..something that did not go beyond "la la la la la" hmm may be I just composed a tune, and yet to find lyrics for the tune, in the mean time my "la la la la la" will do good for me. .. ;) ..

And what about the thing of flying? ohh that..sometimes I feel as if I am a butterfly lol..so whenever I feel like a butterfly then I start singing "I wanna fly high high high" ..It could have been sung "I wanna fly..... (and as if suddenly I bumped into an old friend) ..Hi Hi Hi"..hmm not very funny though.. :P..

Okie now last thing if I really should post this on the blog? I mean I didn’t apply my mind on this blog, but whatever hit my mind I wrote. I wanted to write. I just wanted to say my mind. It was as simple as that. So here you are!

Let me try again

I have been trying to do multiple tasks simultaneously for quite some time now, but may be I am not a genius to handle all the things like that. My mind gets engrossed in one thing that I do and then I can’t think of anything else. If I work on one project, then it occupies my full attention and I can’t think of working on another project simultaneously. I feel it is good that I can concentrate on one thing at a time. May be that’s why I can understand things quickly. But if I try to do several activities at one go then I just end up messing up all. In order to do things in a systematic way, leaving no room for mistakes and thereby failures, I must have to concentrate on one project at a time. I keep revising my time management, as it’s really important for me. I do value time a lot now and do not want to waste a single moment. So I keep working on my time management depending upon the circumstances and my own mental ability to handle them. After thinking really hard, I have come to a conclusion. I must have to forget everything and concentrate on the projects in my hands. These projects include my Job, MBA & English Literature. So let me just try again to follow the systematic route, as I keep distracting myself a lot. But I also keep trying to make the best use of every moment of my life and every single moment is precious to me. I ‘Hope’ & ‘Wish’ I will succeed.

Recognize Real World Complexities

It will be good if I start live in reality and break my dream world. It is very important for us to understand the difference between Reality and Dreams, otherwise we end up becoming a loser at the end of the day. The definition of Reality and Dream is a different aspect and I do not want to touch that aspect at this time. I just want to understand that I must realize where I live, what I do is in the real world. At times I am just so lost in my dreams that I forget the real complexities of the real world facing me head on. Until I recognize those complexities, I can not overcome them. Today, somehow, as human mind keeps working all the time, even when we sleep, it keeps roaming to unknown dimensions, I realized that I can not afford to be indifferent towards the real problems. I need to understand and recognize them and then only I’ll be able to prepare myself to face them and ultimately overcome them.

Can we live like Robots? No.

Okay if for the time being I forget the problems and as I have decided not let my self disturb because of anything, can I really get away with the human emotions? I do not think so, we can be very good organizers of our own lifestyle. We can put extreme pressure on ourselves to improve for the betterment of all, but we can not really get away with the very basic limitations of human beings. Human is emotional character. We can put up a rigid face just to hide our real feelings but we can not live a robotic life. We are humans and we are emotional and can not get away with the human limitations. I was trying to lead a robotic life for some time, but have realized no, it can’t be possible. I can not live a robotic life. Being a human being, I have got be affected by my surroundings and such things do affect me. Well that’s how life goes on, but may be I’ll never stop experimenting all the stuff, that will, I hope, make me a better human being.

Smoky Ashes

I have always been a person who is more into present rather than past, and do not let myself indulge in my past memories. But may be our unconscious mind keeps a record of all the events of past and even if we do not want to disturb our present, these secretly kept memories in our unconscious mind keep creeping into our present. It’s been happening with me for quite some time now. Certain events or words or may be some unspoken lines, though I have moved on and embraced the life at its best now, keep penetrating through my head unintentionally. Today I felt really weird, why the hell these unspoken feelings, thoughts, and memories of my past still haunt me and erupt into my head like volcano. My conscious mind is not able to understand this and at times, becomes helpless in front of my unconscious mind. For me such intrigue memories of past are like smoky ashes. And I’ll never be able to know when these smoky murky reflections will disappear into unknown horizons and I’ll see the clear sky without any cloudy stumbling block of my past. I hope these smoky ashes will fade away one day. I can just hope so.

Drops of Dreamy Dew

I opened my eyes,
Saw myriads of shining sallow pearls,
Surrounding me all around,
Mystified, I thought in empty,
Were those shining drops of morning dew?
Or they were illuminating tiny drops of dreams,
Dreams of the rising hopes?
Or of the fading memories,
Unable to understand,
I walked on to touch a pearl,
And the touch was so delicate and momentary,
Before I could realize,
It vanished like a drop of my dreamy dew.

It’s my first attempt in poem writing.

I Have To Fight With The Fate And Win.

Was just thinking about the various problems one has to face in day to day life. But how can one get cowed down by such petty hindrances. If I can not handle such petty problems then I am good for nothing. And ha, I wanted to fight with my fate! How can a girl with so much confusion in her head, with such a low confidence in herself and with so many fears in her heart, can dream of fighting with her tough luck. But I have to fight with my fate. Fate. Something, I have never had faith in. I have always believed in Dreams. I believe in Desires. I believe in moving ahead, and suddenly this strange burning desire to fight with the Fate has risen in my heart. Can we really fight with something, that’s never been ‘An Existing Identity’ for us. But no matter whatever it is, I have to overcome it. May be we refer to our ‘disappointments and unpleasant outcomes’ as Fate sometimes, or we change our opinion of Fate according to the circumstances we are in. Okay whatever it is, I know what I have to do and that’s all what matters. I have to FIGHT with the FATE. And I have to WIN.

Two months of rigorous practice

I had been wondering for few days, how to tell my seniors the decision I took for the crash course they had offered me some time back. My seniors had asked me to join a crash course, which I was not very keen to join. So I informed them my decision and promised them, what the crash course would teach me in two months, I would teach myself on my own. I took this decision because I knew that I could achieve the same skills by sheer hard work and practice on my own. Though, at the same time I did not want to sound over confident to them, but this was not over confidence and I was sure of that. What could make me perfect in the Art, was not the crash course but my sheer hard work and practice. And I did not want to let them take away the credit of my efforts, which I had been making for several years, in a matter of one and a half month. So, I decided to very politely decline the kind offer. Now I have got the opportunity to devote my all time on the career front. This time around it was not tough for me to explain to my folks at home, and they all respected my decision and supported me. So I will be terribly busy for the next two months at least. I must have to show them results in two months. But I love to take challenges, particularly in the Arts of Knowledge. And I shall keep updating myself on my blog!

A new Day A new Lesson !

Hey! I am back. No, not for useless talk of course but I have decided to come to my blog and write whatever comes across my mind more often from now onwards. It will be a good way to express my thoughts and can always depend upon it whenever I need to review it in future. So, what’s new today? Well it will be an interesting idea if I find out at least one new interesting thing out of my busy routine life or learn something nice and interesting daily. A new day and a new thing to learn and share it with you. What an Idea! So what’s new today..humm may be every time I am asked this question, I start pondering over all the recent activities that has been keeping me busy for the day. So nothing else but only I thought today to come on this blog more often and try to write down my thoughts. I need to learn to clear my thoughts and turn my thoughts into reality. Well it’s a difficult thing to learn but what’s the harm in trying. And yeah today when I was surfing on net (though I had decided not to surf on net, but it was only for few minutes), suddenly a subdued desire to learn French language started to crave again in my heart. As a child, I have always been fascinated by this language. I was surfing a website based on learning various languages, and came across with some nice 'French' exercises, and I instantly got hooked. But yeah, I'll learn it later. For the time being, am learning a lot more essential things in life! I'll divulge on this later. :)

Dedicated Life

I’ll have to lead a dedicated life, dedicated to my work, my studies and my career. I don’t have much time left. Two to three years down the line, I might be forced by my family to simply marry and settle down. But, I don’t want to simply marry and settle down, when I see myself standing nowhere. I do not want to merely Exist but Live. I can not afford to indulge my self in things which will take me nowhere. I must have to be determined and this has to be backed by my strong will power. It’s never too late. Whenever we realize the right way to go ahead, we must go for that then and there, without giving it a second thought. I’ll concentrate fully on my work and my studies. My family needs me, and I must have to look after them also. I’ll try to mend my ways to improve myself for the sake of my family’s happiness, because as they say, Family Comes First. So, no more useless talk with anybody, no more useless net surfing and no more useless distracting activities. And I wish my self Good Luck again!

A little dilemma

Want to work hard, but somehow find myself caught in the dilemma of ‘should I give it a try or not’. And always tend to choose the easiest and most convenient way out. But that’s not what will make my dream come true. I am not looking for something which is easily available. For only rare things, which are not easily available, we make that extra effort. I am looking for something unusual, something unique. Something no one has ever thought of before. But, how I am going to get it when I always choose ‘the easiest way’. I’ll try to build the courage to go for the difficult option. Though it is difficult but if it gets me what I want then it’s worth doing. Lets see how it goes.

For what I was there..

For the past two days, I had been spending all of my spare time on net on a website based on learning various languages. I was doing nothing but just meeting different people and replying to their enormous messages that they had been sending me with much effort. But, may be now its time to get back to my real goal. I wanted to brush up my communication skills, and that’s why I had joined that website. But I ended up finding my self engrossed in the various messages received and lost in replying to each of them. I was enjoying chatting with some of really interesting people out there. But, hell, what about my practice of language. This was indeed a very active and full of fun sort of website for practicing and improving various language skills. There is so much to do that no one can ever feel bored there. But, if I forget the real goal for what I joined that website then there is no point in spending my time there. So I have decided better stay away from the distracting things and concentrate on the various exercises available there to brush up my language skills. So I am back to my goal oriented self again. Good Luck !

In lazy summer afternoons

In lazy summer afternoons, what a better way to spend your lethargic and drowsing time than writing a small blog. Today actually I got a good topic to be written here.

This morning when I was reading the newspaper, as I was going through some boring long article, a line suddenly struck my mind. It was said by some Japanese politician in political context. He said “if you can not stand the heat, get out of the kitchen”.

This line though sounds so simple, but it has a deep and very interesting meaning in it. I have learnt something vital out of it.

Yesterday, it was not a very good day for me. I was experiencing certain problems and obstacles and surely was not in a good mood. I could not sleep well last night because of those irritating problems, that must had been haunting me the whole night.

And this morning though I was not in a mood to go to my study room and study, but whatever be the situation, I make it sure that I won't let my studies suffer because of my mood swings. And when I was reading the article in the Newspaper, this line “if you can not stand the heat, get out of the kitchen” caught my attention.

Of course, I need to stand the heat or else I can simply give it all up, and stay at home, happily, safe, carefree, in cozy surroundings of my sweet home. But ha, I am not a person who believes in giving it up. If I have chosen to come out and follow my dreams then, I must have to be strong enough to fight back and move on and achieve the goals of my life. And what a line that is, it holds true with every aspect of life.

Good, today again this journey of my life has taught me something important. I’ll be back when I get something nice to write. Till then, enjoy the life!

Music is in my blood

Well when I have nothing to do……I really want to groove into music. When I was a young girl, in my school, I used to be a movie buff and if songs would start interrupting the storyline, as it does happen in Indian Movies, I would get really mad at these songs. But now, ailaaa.. what a change!! Now I am not that much interested in the storyline, as I am in the songs and music.

Well while sitting in the office what I can afford to groove into is 'The Instrumental Music'. But I just love the music, tunes keep roaming in mind 24 X 7. May be I find the music so enchanting that I want to lose myself into it, forget the real hard world; forget the tension and burdensome responsibilities and blah blah blah.

So what else is rocking my world..lol..My work, studies, friends, music, personality development program and my own self !!!

Life is a "Bliss"

You know suddenly I started feeling like I have learnt a vital lesson of life..and that lesson is to stay 'Happy' ....

I am really grateful to Almighty God who has taught me this lesson.. and would love if you all can learn the same and stay happy..

May be we all just don’t know why we stay tensed and grieved all the time. We all need to understand one thing that our life is precious and exclusive. Actually, It depends upon our outlook towards life .... .. It’s not our life which is a "Problem"..it’s our outlook towards life that makes it look like a "problem". If we start looking at the life as ‘Bliss’…. then its bound to become a "Bliss" and not a "Problem"...

So what I learnt from my experiences is that..It is our outlook towards life that makes all the difference....just look at life as "Bliss" and suddenly you will find yourself in a bliss !!!

Just don’t let the myriad difficulties, problems, obstacles, deceits of loved one, lies, non achievements of goals and blah blah blah....whatever 'not so good' things in life affect our outlook towards life...

Just be calm, compose, don’t lose your senses and believe you me..you will suddenly find all the solutions in time and life will again be a "Bliss".

Life full of colors and fun

Life suddenly seems dull and colorless. Well this is also a face of life and I know better times are ahead. A time will come when my life will also become full of colors and fun. But what about today? What about this very moment? How do I fill colors in this very moment, which seems so dull to me today.

One way is to forget the problems and daily routine works and let myself loose in relaxation. Then a best therapy is Music that I like to go for most of the time. And of course writing my random thoughts in the blog also brings a lot of relaxation to my mind.

I have started writing this blog, not because I love writing but because I want to express my subdued expressions, which otherwise remain untouched deep in my heart. And I really feel relaxed after I write it all in the blog.

It is a kind of venting machine for me. So whenever I feel like venting out something that has been disturbing me since long, I simply can count on this blog.

I may sound bored, but that’s what I am feeling right now and obviously our moods get transpired in our writings also. But I am sure soon I will be back to my ‘happy go lucky’ mood and this life will again become full of colors and fun.

Keep trying

Okies..so whats next..Sometimes i feel as if... do i write blogs in compulsion? Just for the sake of writing something? Humm..well may be not really...okay let me find out some good topic on which i would like to scratch my head and write something nice here.

Yeah..okay forget all the formalities and let me be the one who i am ...forget about the fake mask i show to this world..and let me be the most spontaneous and natural here..what say..

I tend to indulge my self in many useless activities…though i am trying hard to stay focused..but somehow i end up getting strayed always..

Well the life is all about keep making efforts ..the end result is something which is not in our control ..so whats in my control...i will do that..and that is …. keep trying...