Let me try again

I have been trying to do multiple tasks simultaneously for quite some time now, but may be I am not a genius to handle all the things like that. My mind gets engrossed in one thing that I do and then I can’t think of anything else. If I work on one project, then it occupies my full attention and I can’t think of working on another project simultaneously. I feel it is good that I can concentrate on one thing at a time. May be that’s why I can understand things quickly. But if I try to do several activities at one go then I just end up messing up all. In order to do things in a systematic way, leaving no room for mistakes and thereby failures, I must have to concentrate on one project at a time. I keep revising my time management, as it’s really important for me. I do value time a lot now and do not want to waste a single moment. So I keep working on my time management depending upon the circumstances and my own mental ability to handle them. After thinking really hard, I have come to a conclusion. I must have to forget everything and concentrate on the projects in my hands. These projects include my Job, MBA & English Literature. So let me just try again to follow the systematic route, as I keep distracting myself a lot. But I also keep trying to make the best use of every moment of my life and every single moment is precious to me. I ‘Hope’ & ‘Wish’ I will succeed.

Recognize Real World Complexities

It will be good if I start live in reality and break my dream world. It is very important for us to understand the difference between Reality and Dreams, otherwise we end up becoming a loser at the end of the day. The definition of Reality and Dream is a different aspect and I do not want to touch that aspect at this time. I just want to understand that I must realize where I live, what I do is in the real world. At times I am just so lost in my dreams that I forget the real complexities of the real world facing me head on. Until I recognize those complexities, I can not overcome them. Today, somehow, as human mind keeps working all the time, even when we sleep, it keeps roaming to unknown dimensions, I realized that I can not afford to be indifferent towards the real problems. I need to understand and recognize them and then only I’ll be able to prepare myself to face them and ultimately overcome them.

Can we live like Robots? No.

Okay if for the time being I forget the problems and as I have decided not let my self disturb because of anything, can I really get away with the human emotions? I do not think so, we can be very good organizers of our own lifestyle. We can put extreme pressure on ourselves to improve for the betterment of all, but we can not really get away with the very basic limitations of human beings. Human is emotional character. We can put up a rigid face just to hide our real feelings but we can not live a robotic life. We are humans and we are emotional and can not get away with the human limitations. I was trying to lead a robotic life for some time, but have realized no, it can’t be possible. I can not live a robotic life. Being a human being, I have got be affected by my surroundings and such things do affect me. Well that’s how life goes on, but may be I’ll never stop experimenting all the stuff, that will, I hope, make me a better human being.

Smoky Ashes

I have always been a person who is more into present rather than past, and do not let myself indulge in my past memories. But may be our unconscious mind keeps a record of all the events of past and even if we do not want to disturb our present, these secretly kept memories in our unconscious mind keep creeping into our present. It’s been happening with me for quite some time now. Certain events or words or may be some unspoken lines, though I have moved on and embraced the life at its best now, keep penetrating through my head unintentionally. Today I felt really weird, why the hell these unspoken feelings, thoughts, and memories of my past still haunt me and erupt into my head like volcano. My conscious mind is not able to understand this and at times, becomes helpless in front of my unconscious mind. For me such intrigue memories of past are like smoky ashes. And I’ll never be able to know when these smoky murky reflections will disappear into unknown horizons and I’ll see the clear sky without any cloudy stumbling block of my past. I hope these smoky ashes will fade away one day. I can just hope so.

Drops of Dreamy Dew

I opened my eyes,
Saw myriads of shining sallow pearls,
Surrounding me all around,
Mystified, I thought in empty,
Were those shining drops of morning dew?
Or they were illuminating tiny drops of dreams,
Dreams of the rising hopes?
Or of the fading memories,
Unable to understand,
I walked on to touch a pearl,
And the touch was so delicate and momentary,
Before I could realize,
It vanished like a drop of my dreamy dew.

It’s my first attempt in poem writing.

I Have To Fight With The Fate And Win.

Was just thinking about the various problems one has to face in day to day life. But how can one get cowed down by such petty hindrances. If I can not handle such petty problems then I am good for nothing. And ha, I wanted to fight with my fate! How can a girl with so much confusion in her head, with such a low confidence in herself and with so many fears in her heart, can dream of fighting with her tough luck. But I have to fight with my fate. Fate. Something, I have never had faith in. I have always believed in Dreams. I believe in Desires. I believe in moving ahead, and suddenly this strange burning desire to fight with the Fate has risen in my heart. Can we really fight with something, that’s never been ‘An Existing Identity’ for us. But no matter whatever it is, I have to overcome it. May be we refer to our ‘disappointments and unpleasant outcomes’ as Fate sometimes, or we change our opinion of Fate according to the circumstances we are in. Okay whatever it is, I know what I have to do and that’s all what matters. I have to FIGHT with the FATE. And I have to WIN.

Two months of rigorous practice

I had been wondering for few days, how to tell my seniors the decision I took for the crash course they had offered me some time back. My seniors had asked me to join a crash course, which I was not very keen to join. So I informed them my decision and promised them, what the crash course would teach me in two months, I would teach myself on my own. I took this decision because I knew that I could achieve the same skills by sheer hard work and practice on my own. Though, at the same time I did not want to sound over confident to them, but this was not over confidence and I was sure of that. What could make me perfect in the Art, was not the crash course but my sheer hard work and practice. And I did not want to let them take away the credit of my efforts, which I had been making for several years, in a matter of one and a half month. So, I decided to very politely decline the kind offer. Now I have got the opportunity to devote my all time on the career front. This time around it was not tough for me to explain to my folks at home, and they all respected my decision and supported me. So I will be terribly busy for the next two months at least. I must have to show them results in two months. But I love to take challenges, particularly in the Arts of Knowledge. And I shall keep updating myself on my blog!